Friday, January 21, 2011

Things I will (still) never do.

At some point I'm fairly certain I will have something significant to say on this blog. But not today. 


I was thinking about the idea of blogging as something I claimed I would never do. There are other things I won't do. Here are two. I'm pretty firm on these.


Quote Bono in a sermon.




I like U2's music. Except for that nearly unlistenable Zooropa and Popmart phase. Bono seems like a good guy who goes out of his way to do good things. But there's something vaguely disconcerting about his public image. I think Chuck Klostermann put it best here

By the way, I have no problem quoting Klostermann. I do it all the time (see "poseur" in bio to the right.)

A few years back my wife and I were driving on a day long trip and we started listening to a radio interview with Michael W. Smith.

(Excursus: For those outside of the Evangelical Christian World I live in, Smith is sort of a doyen of the Contemporary Christian Music movement. Like me, he's in his early 50's. Smith had a modicum of "cross over" success in secular music thereby ensuring he's pretty much never going away.)

Smith is being interviewed about his career and a new philanthropy project he's got going. He starts talking about "my friend Bono". A lot. I start playing Bono Bingo to see how many times he will repeat that phrase. I lose count.

So perhaps my aversion is a form of generational paranoia. Michael W. just seemed a bit too eager to bask in the Bono shekinah glory and it rang false and a little pretentious. And when it comes to false and pretentious I just don't need any help.


Wear a headset microphone.



I don't need to be convinced that these provide superior sound to the old school clip on lapel microphones we use at Red Mountain Church. The mic element is closer to and consistently placed from the mouth. And yep, they're getting smaller and even come in a "nude" color (I'm not making that up.)

I just can't shake the Garth Brooks/Brittany Spears/Madonna/goofy youth group leader vibe when it comes to these things. So to be clear I'm not talking about high principle here. 

A few years back I was invited to speak at chapel service at my daughter's high school. Whole school. Big crowd. A few minutes before I begin some kid tries to fit me with a headset microphone. This exchange ensues:

"I don't use these."

"Why not?"

"I don't use these."

"It's the only mic we have!"

"I don't use these."

We end up starting a few minutes late as the kid finally believes me and runs around to find another microphone. He came back with a mic I have to hold in my hand like a lounge singer. It looks a little silly. Just less silly.

I think this may be another reason:





14 comments:

  1. Tom Cannon pictured here as the local youth group practices their version of "Where the Streets Have No Name": http://tinyurl.com/4pm6ezn

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  2. Headset Microphone Nazis must be stopped. They are absolutely relentless when you're speaking "abroad."

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  3. So, you had a choice between Britney mike and Lionel Ritchie mike and you went Lionel. Tough call. [was it cordless so you could get a whole Run DMC vibe going?] I respect your firm stance on a completely trivial issue!

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  4. Despite your disclaimer, everything in this post was extremely significant. I look forward to more.

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  5. I'm with you on the headset mics. Imagine my surprise when I first visited the new beautifully-traditional sanctuary at Covenant Pres in Nashville and all the pastors were wearing them (in "nude"). As I was a visiting member of the choir I had the chance to be near one of the pastors before the service - I almost stepped up to make him aware of the strange thing that had attached itself to his vestments, only to realize it was the curly wire around the back of his neck!! Seemed SO out of place!

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  6. MWSmith is so edgy now! My only MWS CD collects dust in my '80's Christian pop.
    And I do believe those are Shamwows that mic'd guy is holding. You've gotta give a Shamwow a chance. I got Matt some for Christmas. No idea what we're gonna do with them, but they're fun to say.

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  7. Can I sing a Bono quote if I get to preach up there again, "But I steeeeeeel havunt found wut I'm lookin' for"?

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  8. Is there a picture of you holding the mic like a lounge singer? Would love to see that.

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  9. "bask in the Bono shekinah glory"
    להבדיל

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  10. You are a blog tease, Cannon. You have to post at least twice a week for this to be legit. You are almost sixty! You should have plenty of ruminations, gripes, and stories saved up. Do this thing or don't (to paraphrase Yoda)!

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  11. Twice a week? Good grief.

    Maintaining this level of self-referential irony is exhausting work Pat.

    Shooting for once a week.

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  12. Scott used to quote Jeff Tweedy. And I loved it.

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  13. i'm so glad you're at rmc and that i'm a member of rmc. just wish we could be there more often.

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  14. But where do you stand on quoting Lord of the Rings in sermons? I'm contra.

    Ben Palmer in Melbourne - where you are of course well-remembered

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